Today I want to talk about something that I recognize in many people…. The fear of Change.
How many of you are scared just thinking about having to change something in your life? It might be your house, moving out to another city or country, changing jobs, changing partner or just changing the bus you usually take to go to work….! Yes. This is all scary. And the most interesting part is that it is scary, even when you know that this change is for the better.
As humans, we are all somehow “addicted” to our little routine: our morning routine, the soap is always at the same place in the shower, the kitchen, our car, our colleagues at work…. We may be complaining so much about so many things but at the end, when we are used to them, it is even harder to get off from them, no matter how bad they are! And that’s the complexity here.
Why? Why are we scared of something that will make us happier? What is it that makes us somehow keep on doing/being the same even if deep inside we truly want to change?
You have to go back to those fears and understand them: where do they come from? Why would you prefer a “poor” situation to a new exciting promising one? What holds you back?
Going out of your comfort zone is the only way to get out of it. Yes, it might be difficult to move out or find a new job or a new spouse! But if that is what you need to do, then do it. It will be scary, it will be difficult and will demand a lot of effort from you, but you know that you have to do it and that this is all worth it. So just do it. Go out there and take action. You have the control of your own life.
Many people complain about their job more than anything else. If you are in this depressing job that you hate, and you want to do something new and different. Do it! Don’t be your own problem on your way to success, you don’t need that!
People complain about their situation, yet they don’t change anything. Why is that? Weirdly enough, it is because they are used to this situation. Even if they don’t like it, they made their life around it and kind of adapted themselves to it. So to them, getting out of it is kind of…scary.
So be courageous. DON'T SETTLE FOR SOMETHING YOU DON'T LIKE. Your life is worth more than that. What is the worst thing that can happen? Nothing!!! Even if your move is not very efficient, well at least you are doing something, moving forward and challenging yourself. You will only get better on the way. By staying as you are without ever stepping out of this comfort zone, that’s when your life runs away without waiting for you.
There are many stories out there of people who got very successful and started making a lot of money. But their entourage, their friends didn’t feel good with that, and they started criticizing those successful people with words like: “You are not the same anymore” or “you wouldn’t have done that before” or any negative comment that is actually just a reflection of their own perception of their own situation…. Well those successful people, because they felt “left over” and not loved anymore, screwed everything: they lost everything and went back to where they were before. All because actually, they couldn't stand this negative energy around them. This shows how much it is important to surround yourself with good-willing people. People who truly care about you, who will only wish you the best, and who will be happy for you and celebrate your success and help you get there. Negative people often pull you down and even if they love you, they would actually prefer if you don’t change at all. Maybe because they are afraid to lose you, but often because they can not face their own reality.
In other words: be aware of those behaviors. Have enough belief in yourself to be able to see when that happens. You can still be there for them but don’t let them limit you at their own expectations. If you believe and want bigger, it’s because you can do it. Show them the way and inspire them.
This might be easy for some people, and extremely scary and terrible just to think about for some others. That’s because of the paradigm that we all have within ourselves. Re-program yourself. Make yourself your own hero. Change your thoughts for POSITIVE ones. Stop complaining and take action. Surround yourself with only positive, loving energy, from the inside out. Because if YOU don’t change anything, NOTHING will ever change. Be positive, willing to change, willing to take on new challenges, willing to improve your life and to make it the way you dream about it. Anyone can succeed, even you! Don’t be scared of what will happen. Only good things happen when they are made with positive intention and love. Success is not about the goal. Success is the journey. Move forward and you will be successful, no matter what happens.
I am myself struggling with my own limitations. I can feel it, I am sometimes blocking myself for no apparent reason. One way that helps me get over that is to meditate on it, and write in a journal my feelings and emotions about it. It is like an onion that you peel: there are so many things that you discover about yourself. But as you are working on yourself, your transformation is already happening. You become stronger because you understand yourself better and you can manage tough situations better. Life is an eternal learning journey. So yes, I have to kick myself out of my comfort zone. Many times! And every time it is so much worth it. The reward, the self-appreciation and self-esteem that you get from it, make you want to do it again. So yes, I am myself still learning so much and I am still so bad sometimes. But hey, who really wants to be perfect? ;-)
Hope this will give you some nice challenging ideas for the week to come :-)
In Love and Happiness,